He charmed viewers from the masseria during the last series of I Kissed A Boy, but now Adam has joined our ranks to answer some burning queer quandaries…
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My girlfriend and I haven’t had sex in ages. Are we doomed, or just victims of the September slump and too many Sunday roasts?
The time has come to swap those roast potatoes for some scheduled steamy sex. We find time for our friends, family, work and a social life, but it’s so important to make sure you are giving the same energy to your relationship — scheduling sex could spark that fire you had in the dreamy honeymoon phase.
My gym crush always spots me on the bench press but blanks me at the juice bar. How do I move from protein shakes to actual dates?
A couple of solutions here, with the first being the most sensible – write your number down on a piece of paper and hand it over when you change sets. Or my personal favourite, if you really want to get their attention, hook your phone up to the sound system and play ‘Juno’ by Sabrina Carpenter — when the song gets to ‘Have you ever tried this one?’, break into full performance and shake that toned butt you’ve been squatting towards. I admit I’ve never tried this one, but I’ll practise what I preach and report back in a month.
Since I came out, my nan keeps asking me to explain every queer character in the latest Netflix shows. How do I set boundaries without crushing her new hobby?
First of all, we love a nan who wants to know more about the community, bit of a slay to be honest. She sounds like a hoot. But remember, it’s not your responsibility to explain what it means to be queer or be the beacon of queer culture. Get her on TikTok and set her algorithm to loads of LGBTQ creators and watch her world open up – sorry in advance for moving this dilemma into navigating technology instead of explaining what it means to be queer.
I accidentally slept with both halves of a couple. Separately. Neither of them knows. Am I a homewrecker, or should I pitch myself as their missing piece?
Talk about buy-one-get-one-free! Who doesn’t love a bargain? If they’re having their cake and eating it separately, you aren’t a home wrecker, but you’ll probably be surprised by their reaction. Honestly is always the best policy, so I suggest telling them. It could get spicier! But remember, protection is HOT and if you aren’t on PrEP, get yourself down to 56 Dean Street.
Every guy on Grindr either ghosted me or I’ve ghosted them. Now they all keep turning up in my algorithm on Instagram. Do I delete the app, or just delete London?
I spent 10 years in London, built a career, gained friends, lost friends, had incredible romances, and proper sex, but the one thing that stayed the same was the city. London is the hub of all things beautiful. In my opinion, you won’t regret deleting Grindr, but you need to fill your cup outside of dating apps. There’s more to dating than just meeting people on apps. Put yourself in situations where you have to actually talk to people. In my experience, there is nothing sexier than eye contact and real connection, not superficial tapping and messaging.
I’m bisexual, but my mates keep calling me ‘half straight’ and only invite me to queer nights as their token. How do I stop being the group mascot?
Does this group mascot come with a fun outfit or an hourly rate? I thought not. I think the world is moving past labels and if your friends don’t stop labelling you, I think a new set of pals would be wise. Try going to social groups around London, like crafty art clubs, swimming and running clubs. Get your queer on, branch out and find your tribe.
My bestie and I both kissed the same guy at Mighty Hoopla. It’s September, but he’s still salty about it. How do I defuse the glittery tension?
Shock horror! If I’m being sincere, are you surprised? Among the joy, dancing and endless drinks at Mighty Hoopla, I think we’ve all been in the situation of kissing the same guy — the gays are on heat during Mighty Hoopla! At the end of the day, it’s a sticky situation that lots of us find ourselves in at one time or another. London really isn’t that big. Sharing is caring, right?
Got a bit of a pickle on your hands?
Send your questions over to editorial@gaylondonlife.co.uk and we may use them in our next issue.
*Photo by Jennifer Smith
