TRANSGENDER AWARENESS WEEK: Alexis asks “Is there a right way to transition?”

How do I qualify to answer the question you may ask?

My name is Alexis and I am a transgender woman now 3 years into transition, Hello. There can be so much discourse online about what it means to be trans, how to transition ‘properly’, and what surgeries are ‘needed’ to be a valid trans person. Short answer, there is no right way to transition. Please note that this article is simply my opinion and if you disagree that’s ok!

NHS or Private healthcare?

The poor access to health care we have as trans people is shocking. I was referred to a gender specialist back in September 2021. I still have 2 more years to wait until I get that initial appointment. Because of the long wait times (currently 5 years), many trans people opt to go the private route. For me that was what I felt I had to do, I couldn’t bear presenting as a male any longer so I reached out to a private practice and waited less than 6 months for the referral. Which way is the right way, NHS or private? EITHER, many variables such as age, economic status, and patience levels come into this decision.

Hormones – Do we need them to transition?

HRT (hormone replacement therapy) is often used for transgender patients
to help with transition. The effects of HRT for me have been phenomenal, from softening my body hair, filling out the curves in my body, and developing breast tissue. I think for many trans people HRT is necessary for transition as it can help our gender identity match our outside shell. Social transition can happen without the use of HRT but in my experience, hormones have been the biggest help on my journey.
Let’s talk about ‘Passing’

Do you have to pass to be trans?

Of course not. Should passing be a goal for transition? Well, let me draw on my personal experience here. One of my personal goals of transition was to be able to walk around a supermarket undetectable. Not because of trans shame but to be looked at as a woman, how I have always felt on the inside. Everyone’s transitions are so different, including the starting points we all begin from. So, I would say passing is not needed to be trans, but for me personally its something I have worked towards for the last 3 years.

Surgeries- Are they all NEEDED?

Short answer- NO. If a trans person chooses to get surgeries it is completely personal. For me, I have used surgeries to feminise my appearance where possible whilst still looking like myself. Not every trans person needs or even wants surgeries to transition. They are painful, expensive and recovery is no joke. Some people claim you ‘need’ bottom surgery to be valid in your transition. I disagree with this completely. I think bottom surgery is an incredibly personal thing. The want/need for bottom surgery depends on that individual’s dysphoria and where that manifests in their body. It’s also about weighing up the pros and cons of what complications can happen during surgery and dealing with the after effects.
The Roadmap to Transition

Unfortunately, there is no exact guide on how to have a seamless and easy transition. One thing I have learned along the way is that everyone’s transition journeys are so different. All I can advise is the following. Do whatever you need to do, to be happy and live your life the way YOU want to live it.

Until next time,
Alexis Blake xox