They’re the sort of thing you need ASAP so speedypoppers.co.uk has your back (ahem)
We all know the sinking feeling – you’ve got a VCR machine that needs cleaning or a house full of rooms that need odourising, but when you go to your special drawer, you find that your little brown bottles have run completely dry. Not even the faintest whiff of something inside.
Back in days gone by, this would have necessitated an undignified dash into town, but things have, quite thankfully, moved on since then. Just as you can get a meal cycled over to you in minutes or you can summon a shag to your bed in seconds, you can have poppers in your room in no time at all thanks to speedypoppers.co.uk.
How speedy, you ask? Well, if you live in London (inside the M25 too, don’t start with your Redhill this and Hemel Hempstead that), they can be with you within three hours. If you reside close to Clapham, you can get them even quicker if you click and collect them from the Fetch store. For everywhere else in the UK, it’s next-day delivery, which, come on, you still have to admit is pretty good. They come in discreet packaging too, so your courier has no idea about the filthy weekend you have planned removing nail varnish or cleaning leather goods (look we’re all adults here).
And of course, if you’re getting poppers delivered to you quickly, where’s the harm in stocking up a bit? Speedypoppers has all your favourite brands – from Rush and Liquid Gold to Jungle Juice and Bear’s Own – and these are all available in a wide range of multibuy pick ‘n’ mix offers, with the prices going down to £3.50 a bottle if you buy in high enough quantities.
Despite the name, it’s not just poppers either. Take a browse through their site and you’ll find condoms, lube, douches, cock rings and ball stretchers – all the trusted brands and all just as speedy. Basically, if you think there’s even the slightest chance of you getting lucky in the next twenty-four hours, the thoughtful folk at Speedypoppers can guarantee you have everything you might need to hand. Isn’t it fab living in the twenty-first century?
Check them out and order your same-day ( inside m25 ) delivery!