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Helen Scott’s Festive Funny: What kind of Christmas Gay are you?

When I was asked to write a fun and uplifting article for December I thought, fuck… Can I feign illness this month? As a self-proclaimed Grinch I love the eating, the drinking and general merriment don’t get me wrong but this time of year can feel a little… intense. So, I’m taking you back to my Mizz days with a fabulous, ridiculous Christmas Quiz to see which type of Christmas gay you are! It doesn’t get camper than this, and that is my kind of Christmas spirit!

If Santa was the last person alive, would you sleep with him?
The results:

The Anxious gay
Maybe you don’t always make the most well-thought-out decisions but you have the best
intentions at heart! A romantic beneath it all your lack of judgement could lead to a pretty spicy yuletide so be mindful, babes! It’s the time of year to be grateful, to love yourself hard, and lift up those around you in the most authentic way. As well as to eat, drink, be merry, and get laid of course!

The Camp Gay
Girl, you encapsulate Christmas, it’s literally your time to shine. Deck the halls, grab Chrimbo by the balls but just remember not to be too overbearing and share the fun with those around you. Not even the biggest lovers of Christmas, or Mariah Carey fans, can listen to ‘All I Want for Christmas’ on repeat. But, you have the power to instill even the most Scrooge of all Scrooges with a little Christmas cheer, so keep it up and don’t be sad when it’s over, it’ll come around again quicker than you think (God help us)!

The power Gay
Your presents are wrapped, your recipes are selected, the christmas cards have been sent and the turkey’s in the freezer. You’ve slayed Christmas and it’s only December 1st! But remember to take your foot off the gas and let Christmas time surprise you now and then. Notice the flirty looks through the rain, hear the sound of the choirs singing, the magic is all around you as Bill Nighy would say. I’m defo coming to yours for Christmas ‘cause I doubt you’d even let anyone else do the washing up you’re such a Monica, and that sounds good to me!

Wishing you all a fun, festive and happy Christmas. Helen xx

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