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Wednesday, May 29, 2024

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Big Tips for your Big Day by Proudfox Ceremonies

This month’s cover stars Martin Fox-Roberts and Maria Hurtz might never have been seen in the same room together, but they’ve helpfully shared some advice on how to organise an unforgettable wedding. 

We chatted to both of them to find out their Big tips for your Big Gay Day, starting with..

Budgeting

Martin: Agree where you are going to prioritise your big spending.The venue? flowers? The videographer and photographer? Keep between 10-12% of your budget aside for unexpected costs. Think about what you could do to keep costs down, but consider if you’re compromising quality or the overall effect. Don’t forget to consider insurance especially if you’re spending a lot.

Maria: Through caution to the wind! You only get wed once (although I’ll give a little discount for repeat customers). Hopefully, you’re marrying someone who is rich or at least has credit cards with air miles — well, you want a great honeymoon too! Celebrants

Martin: A celebrant will create a personalised ceremony that will give you exactly what you want for your special day. You’ll need a registrar to make it legal and celebrants can perform the Wedding ceremony either before or after this happens.

Maria: None of this boring, impersonal dribble from an ‘authorised’ person. Get a celebrant (preferably me!), make it personal and have the party start with the ceremony!
Personalisation

Martin: Agree on a theme, something special for you and your spouse — it could be something like a 1920s theme or a film such as Rocky Horror. Keep it authentic and don’t try to copy someone else’s wedding — just do you!

Maria: Oh, this is the part where you can let your imagination run wild! Be sexy, be daring and really push the boat out. Besties coming down the aisle with you – eh, no! What about topless guys in hot pants?

The Entrance

Martin: If you haven’t guessed it already, you can throw the rule book out of the window when you have a celebrant wedding. Why not have two aisles where you both walk in together and meet at the front?

Maria: Look, this is your moment to make a statement and get everyone talking. I’ve got one couple who are planning to make an entrance with a brass band. Remember, this is the start of the party and not the boring bit before!

Rituals

Martin: Make your ceremony extra personal by adding a unity ritual, such as a handfasting, loving cup, tree- planting or burying a time capsule.

Maria: My favourite is a ‘ring-warmin’! Yes my darlings, get your rings out and let them be warmed in a ritual where the people who you’ve invited hold their hands over your rings and send their love and wishes for you. When it comes to the ring exchange, your rings are charged with everyone’s love. I also want a ‘Whip Me, I Do’ ritual at the commitments — I read the commitments and whip you until you say ‘I Do’. Any willing couples?

Vows

Martin: Your vows are the most intimate part of the wedding. Tell your spouse everything you love about them and how they make you feel. Write what you will bring to your marriage and what you promise to do to keep your relationship strong. And remember to say ‘I love you’.

Maria: Make them fun! Do it as a song or write about the things about your other half that get on your nerves, too…but quickly add that you still love them, of course. Oh, and don’t go on and on to the point where everyone is thinking, ‘gurl, get a room’ or ‘get me to those canapés’!

Wedding Rings

Martin: Think about which metal you want, as there’s so much choice out there. Consider the look, the value over time and density (you may need to have them resized so pick a metal which is easy to change the size).

Maria: Now I love my bling, but not everyone does. There’s nothing stopping you from replacing your ring with a watch, a necklace or a bracelet — hell, couples even get tattoos! If you do go down the ring route, remember a lot of jewellers offer complimentary glasses of bubbly, so just go and get a bit pissed for free! Enjoy yourself

Martin: Be mindful of the language you use when planning your day. Using words like ‘the perfect day’ or ‘the big day’ can add to the pressure and cause stress! Learn to accept that everything isn’t going to be perfect. Focus on having fun and making memories.

Maria: Okay, let me spell it out for you — this is your day, so don’t worry about what others want or say you should do. People will be there for you and they are celebrating you! Take a breather

Martin: There are key points when you should take a breather! The first is in the planning stages, which can be really stressful and overwhelming. So stop, step away from it all and come back to it all with fresh eyes and mind. The second is when you make your entrance and walk up the aisle. When you reach the top and before the ceremony continues, just take a breath, look at your partner and everyone else — then, continue.

Maria: Oh yes, once that wedding ball starts rolling, it won’t stop and before you know it, your day is over in a flash! So in the evening when the party is going strong and Pam from work thinks it’s a great time to do her party trick, take some time out and find a quiet spot, even for just 15 minutes, during which you can check in with each other.

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